Good morning to my loyal BC nation. I'm
back!!!!! I've taken the last few years to focus on myself. I went
on a diet (I've lost 350lbs!), changed my eating habits, and spent the last few
years studying in a Buddhist monastery cut off from the rest of the
world. But now I'm back!
So what did I miss? Oh, the #MeToo
movement has taken off and is bringing to light sexual predators and their
shitty behavior? Good! Bout damn time. Donald Trump is
President?!? Shit. That news is testing my ability to stay on my
new diet. I can do it though. No sheet caking for me anymore. What
else is new? Katie Lewek got a bad review? Um, ok. What did the review
say? Body shaming??!?!? Alright, fuck this. Someone get me my
writing Oreos. It's time to get back on the anger eating horse.
Apologies to the horse...
“I can always
count on you, Croissant.”
Bari-Chunks has already addressed this stupid
trend in opera reviews. We've written a couple posts about the horrible
actions against Tara Erraught (A taste of their own medicine and Round two. Ding. Ding). What the fuck
gives these reviewers the right to write about how people look on stage?
Have they looked in the mirror? Well guess what mutha fuckas! “If you’re
gonna be an ass, daddy’s gonna buy you a looking glass” You'd think these
idiots would learn...
"They criticized this????"
I've met Kathryn Lewek. I've heard her
sing. Her Queen of the Night is INSANE. It's the best I've ever
heard. And on top of that, she's an amazing person! She’s incredibly
kind, humble, down to earth, and just plain awesome so any review that
criticizes her is going to get a minimum one raised eyebrow from yours truly. But…let's
see what was written about her performance of Eurydice in Offenbach's Orpheus
in the Underworld.
"Fat."
"Buxom."
"Fat woman in tight corsets spreading their legs."
DA FUCK????? Oh, they also praised her
high notes, so that makes everything ok. 🙄 Ok, and who is the Grade A, top shelf snack
who saw fit to judge another person's appearance?
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Really?!?!?! This ass-hat even doubled down after being
called out on Twitter for his idiocy.
Oh this is too easy. I'm not even going
to write in a paragraph form. I mean, one of the suggested image searches of one of his pictures is a sketch of a suspected murderer!!
I mean, those eyes do scream "I've got toes in my fridge!"
I'm just going to list my reviews of this grumpy
ass pinecone.
Brug looks like the Dollar Store version of
Bert and Ernie's love child.
Brug looks like a crowd scene extra from a
Christopher Guest movie who got cut for stealing all the pastries off the Kraft
services table
Brug's professional pictures look like he
juuuuuust trusted a fart that he really shouldn’t have…every single one.
Brug looks like a man accused of leaving dead
rabbits on several people's front stoops.
Brug looks like he absorbed his conjoined twin
in the womb and that’s the story he tells first at any social gathering
Brug looks like Mr Bean's older, unsuccessful
brother Mr. Beano who doesn’t get talked about in his parents Christmas letter
Brug looks like he dresses his pet birds in matching
scarves.
Brug looks like he wears ascots, and only
ascots, when he’s home alone
Brug looks like he volunteers to do police
lineups for sexual crimes.
Brug looks like his neck beard is growing a
neck beard.
Brug looks like a man with so few friends that
he took four professional photos and not one person told him his glasses and
collar are crooked in every.single.one.
Brug looks like he practices giving himself
high fives.
Brug looks like he has a mouth full of raw
broccoli and hot cheetos at all times
Brug looks like his favorite movie is
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Brug looks like he’d tell you to put the lotion
in the basket or you get the hose again.
I mean I could do this all day. How does it feel
Mr. Brug? Are you enjoying yourself? Why would you think it is appropriate
to comment of a performers weight/looks?
1.
Performers have little to
no control about how they are costumed in any production and I think you know
that. So really your beef should be with the production side of the coin but
it’s pretty clear your real problem is with women and their bodies fitting into
the very small lens that you deem attractive enough to be respected so let’s
just call a spade a spade here.
2. Why the fuck do you think it's relevant? It's opera! It’s
story telling, fantastical story telling at that, and guess what? Plenty of
stories are told everyday by people who look different than your purview. Based
on Ms. Lewek’s storied career, she’s told many more of them and at a much
higher level that you ever have or could. Your level of ignorance is mind
blowing.
3. The fact you doubled down on your ignorant, hateful stance is
just more proof that you have no place in "journalism." I invite you
to take your seat in your rightful place - out back with the garbage!
-thedeparted
